Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Baggage in the Attic

I feel really excited to start attempting to blog more now. I've enjoyed my break and for a while I sort of debating coming back to it all. I mean, I've had a little more drama with the blog world then I care for so for a time I didn't see the point. But now, even with all the Christmas hoopla going on, I've been getting excited about coming back.

One thing I really wanted to address was some worries/questions about my situation. I know a few people have been worried so I wanted to describe in the best way possible what my therapy sessions are for. Everyone should know that its perfectly natural to go to therapy if you are not depressed or suicidal. I'm not either one of those. I love my life more than I can ever express in words.

But I do have baggage. 

What normal, honest human being doesn't at one point in their life have that? 

A couple weeks ago G.I. Joe was gone so one Sunday my Dad and I spent the morning going to church, running errands, and eating lunch. I don't know how the subject came up but I started explaining to him why people might need therapy. He is definitely the most level-headed, happy, content, baggage free person I've ever known so I had to start from scratch with explaining this...

When certain events happen in our lives we mentally keep souvenirs and mementos.

As time goes by those aren't out in the open they are stored in suit cases in our attics.

But the suit cases are always there, laying around getting in the way.

At certain points we may deny the existence of the luggage. We trip over it...but we would never admit that's what made us fall.

Other times we may randomly open one and shake our fists at the sky in anger and frustration.

Then there is the dwelling. That's when we just curl up in the suit case and try to live there.

Something has to be done about the baggage. But on our own or with a dear friend we may just spend more time pouring over the mementos to the point that it runs our entire life.

My therapist sits with me in my attic.

Sometimes I cry a little. But I generally laugh more.

Piece by piece we go.
She listens.

I tell her about the time I got my Probable-Widow {metaphorical} t-shirt. Some "friends" gave it to me before G.I. Joe went to Iraq. They wanted me to be sure I "knew what I was in for." Sweet wedding gift, huh?

We discuss how the t-shirt makes me feel.

And its connection to my {metaphorical} skip-a-meal-to-look-perfect-when-he-returns skinny jeans.

Then I fold the t-shirt up.
Like it or not its a part of my story.
I don't throw it out.

But I actually pack it away this time.

That is what therapy is for. Its simply a way to inventory your baggage and learn to live a life that is not defined by one single t-shirt.


allissa said...

This was an AWESOME post, and I totally agree with you. When I was going to therapy it REALLY helped me!

Madison {Life Happens During Naptime} said...

Thoughtful friends.

Anonymous said...

who in their right mind would give a friend a shirt that says that??

Therapy is normal. I go see a therapist from time to time.

Letters From Home said...

"Then I fold the t-shirt up.
Like it or not its a part of my story.I don't throw it out." LOVE this! So honest and real!

Lora said...

Whoever gave you that T-shirt are "friends" you would be better off NOT having. Ouch!

What a great way to define therapy though!

Mrs. G.I. Joe said...

I don't have contact anymore with those friends. The crazy thing is you'd think that they would have been immature 19 year olds like me but they were "adults." They genuinely thought for some reason that it was in my best interest to remind me that I would "probably end up a widow by the age of 20."

I can see how being honest and saying "I love you dearly and this all seems fast. Have you planned for 'the worst' just in case so you will be taken care of?" But this wasn't that sort of "help" at all. Far from it.

Birdie said...

Such a thoughtful, honest post! You have a healthy outlook on life and all that comes with it!

Anonymous said...

Therapy is totally natural and I've done it for a while. It really helps!

That T-shirt is a joke. I can't believe anyone would even fathom giving it to you. Horrible. I'm glad you aren't friends with them anymore!

Anonymous said...

What an awesome post, J. Great look at what therapy is about! I'm glad that it's all going well for you and that you've decided to return to the blogging world (drama be damned . . . ) Love you!

L.C. said...

I'm so happy to read something from you again!!!! And I'm glad to hear you are working through these things :-)

Sarah said...

I'm so glad you're back!!! Great post. =)

Truth be told, I could probably use some therapy myself... I just haven't gotten up the gumption to go up the attic. =) It's good to know that there are wonderful people like yourself admitting that it's OK to get some therapy.

Anonymous said...

I really enjoyed your story. Thank you so much for sharing. Your writing style is impeccable.

A Lady in Waiting said...

Very well said hun! This was a great explanation and understanding of why it is ok. I hope that more wives/fiancees/girlfriends will realize too that it is OK to get therapy. It does not make you a weak person or a sick person. It just means that you know you have things to work through and it will just make you happier in the end! :-) Love you girl. XOXO

Kayla said...

When I read the T-shirt I sat here and wanted to punch your "friends" in the face. What kind of people would do that to someone about to embark on this journey?? Some support THAT is.
I'm glad you're not friends with them anymore. If you ever see them again, flip them off for me. ;)

lilmoomoo said...

Um. Wow. I would have been SO mad if my "friends" got me that t-shirt. I hope they aren't your "friends" anymore!!

And I LOVED your metaphor for baggage, and therapy. Great Read :)